Success is not a straight line
I know this. I consistently share with my yoga students that every day is a new beginning and to expect new possibilities and experiences on their mat every time they return. What was possible yesterday, may or may not be possible today. Our bodies are continually changing and affected by many factors -- sleep, food, stress, aging, etc. However, one thing is for sure, consistent practice does move you in a forward direction, even if there are many detours.
So why do I expect that healing from trauma -- whether physical, emotional or both -- would be any different?
When my daughter Jessica returned home from the hospital after being pretty much immobile in bed for 11 days, she was weak and barely able to hold herself upright even in the bed. Since home healthcare provided a different physical therapist each visit, cooperation and a working relationship was not able to be established between a non-verbal and intellectually-disabled patient and therapist, making it impossible for anything to be accomplished. So we abandoned the home healthcare.
The challenge of rehab now fell mostly on the shoulders (literally!. . .and back too!) of Jessica's loving live-in caregiver Mary. . . only to be relieved by me on the weekends that Jessica spent at my house.
Progress was painfully slow (at least from this impatient mother's point of view). I couldn't understand why one day she would hold her head upright and seem eager to stand and walk, with lots of assistance of course, and other days had to be literally pried out of the chair! Though Mary made sure Jess walked while in the house with assistance, there seemed to be no evidence that she was receiving this help at her day program. As a result, Jess became very resistant to moving from the chair. I became very discouraged, fearing Jess was on a permanent backslide.
In an effort to lift my spirits, Mary shared that on one occasion when she took Jess to a scheduled doctor appointment, she decided it best to put the wheelchair in the car in case Jess couldn't or wouldn't walk (not knowing how much of either was involved). As luck would have it, when it was Jessie's turn to be seen by the doctor, she stood up and with only arm in arm assistance, walked into the examining room.
My point in telling this story is back to my declaration about success -- progress, recovery, achieving goals -- none of it moves in a straight line. BUT, with consistency and determination (and a little help from your friends!), we get to where we were meant to go. Because of Mary's loving ways and kind words, through the support of my meditation group and my own meditation and yoga practice and journaling, I was reminded of the zig-zagging healing journey that is life, and returned to a peaceful place of allowing. In the words of Abraham-Hicks, I return to "Happy with what is, and Eager for More!". Jessica is getting better every day!
Life is a journey. . .just not a straight line!